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Showing posts with label burglary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label burglary. Show all posts

Saturday, 19 September 2015

Saturday fiction – ‘Tidy burglars’

This excerpt is from Chapter 5 of Sudden Vengeance, published in paperback and e-book format by Crooked Cat Publishing, available at the usual outlets. [I could have used the first chapter or two from the book, but they're available to read for free on Amazon anyway.]
 

                          Youth Let Off
                          Judge Wallside dismissed the case against Steven Campion, 17,
                          charged with sexually assaulting his neighbour’s six-year-old girl.
                          “I understand that while you babysat, the girl was provocative in
                          her nightdress,” the judge said.
                          The parents of the child intend to appeal.
                          A Child Protection Agency spokeswoman said, “This sends out
                          entirely the wrong signals. The judge’s comments were
                          wholly inappropriate.”
                          – The Alverbank Chronicle
Tuesday

Hunched over the Formica table, his small bony frame angular and dejected like some wilting flower, Ben Morrison sat in the kitchen, staring at the mail that had floated to the doormat minutes after his wife, Mary, popped out to catch the bus to Pompey. She was visiting her old friend, Jane. She’d said that on her way back she’d drop in on the corner shop to get a carton of milk – “cheaper than from the milkman”. Unspoken was the fact that they needed to watch the pennies because they had no pounds to look after themselves.

Fingers trembling, he slit open the envelope and, though expecting it, he still could not believe the building society intended to repossess their house.

He must have read the formal letter about ten times but it was still the same, though the words began to swirl in front of his eyes.

A terrible gnawing emptiness settled in his stomach. He removed his spectacles and nervously rubbed his eyes and creased brow. A stray lock of greying brown hair fell across his vision. At least I’ve got all my hair, he thought sanguinely. I’ve got little else!

Wasn’t it enough that he’d lost his job, after all these years? No, the society’s managers weren’t running a charity but a business. They didn’t care about people, not really, only their shareholders and dividends... Market forces, that was it. Just like warfare, he thought, and I’m one of the casualties in the bloody infantry!

Last night’s Alverbank Chronicle lay open on the table. To save money he only got the Thursday edition now, for the job vacancies. Face-up, a quarter-page building society advertisement exhorted first-time buyers to take their special offers, to be sucked into the lender’s unfeeling maw, while houses were taken away from existing customers at an unprecedented rate. The small print exonerated them from responsibility or compassion: “your house might be at risk if you cannot keep up payments”.
 
The redundancy money – all £10,000 of it! – had paid off a couple of credit cards and they needed the rest to survive until another job – he laughed – came along. Though it wasn’t likely, ageism was so rife and he was all of fifty-two.
 
Perhaps the building society was right in their assessment. Maybe he was a lost cause, a risk they’d prefer to jettison. He might never get another job, even if the economy perked up. He might never earn enough to repay the loan, at their usurious rates. And, to think, his taxes helped them get out of the mess they had got themselves into!
 
Whatever Mary and I scraped together over fifteen years to pay off the interest will be lost.

He’d worked for a home over their heads, a future for their retirement, but even that had been a house built on sand: the government destroyed his private pension, made it virtually worthless. In fact, all those pension funds had been used to bolster up the top-heavy creaking government machinery of state. All he’d accomplished was to pay out interest to faceless financiers who squirreled away obscene bonuses. Now they had nothing.
 
Ben crumpled the damned standard apology letter into a ball and flung it across the kitchen. It landed on the draining board, amidst the breakfast cereal bowls and mugs. Absently buttoning his fawn cardigan, he walked over and brushed the offending paper on the floor. He used too much washing-up liquid, bubbles overflowing, and when he immersed the dishes he scalded his hands, forgetting to let cold into the bowl. He thrust his fingers under the cold tap then, in violent agitated movements, he washed the dishes.
 
His mind seemed full of cotton wool, like that morning when he drove back from his job in Havant for the last time. He still marvelled how he had managed to arrive home without being in an accident on the M27, because the entire journey was a blank.
 
To be fair, he’d been warned of the possibility of redundancy. And Steve, his shop-floor manager, had been sympathetic about it. The personnel chap, Dave, he’d been understanding, offering to pass on any vacancy details he got wind of, and they would cover the cost of his postage and phone calls that related to his job search. Never did, though, did he?
 
Yet the humane approach still couldn’t lighten the dull dead weight in his chest and, worse, his mind.

Then, he’d wondered how they would manage. Now, he realised, they couldn’t.
 
Ben stared out the kitchen window. Mary’s rockery was looking unkempt. Some of the heather had died. The miniature firs were scorched with frost. Winter was not the best time of year for gardening, he supposed. Not the best time to be left homeless, either. With no family to fall back on, he felt lost, useless. No job, and now no bloody home! He’d failed Mary and most of all himself!
 
God, he thought, I can’t put her through this!
 
He kicked the pedal bin.
 
When he finished stacking the dishes on the worktop, he opened the cutlery drawer and, about to dry the spoons with a tea towel, he noticed his screwdriver and chisel in the side-compartment. “Handy for any quickie jobs,” he constantly explained when Mary Spring-cleaned.

His mouth went dry.
 
Ben picked up the chisel and glanced at the garage access door.
 
*** 
Gulls screeched and fought over food scraps and pecked at a clutter of cardboard boxes on the pebble-covered shoreline.

From the police station’s office window Paul Knight watched them, his thoughts momentarily transported to the graveside.

In complete contrast to the scavenging birds, the station was relatively quiet. He’d had a busy day and didn’t want to meet too many officers. Most had handed over their duties and left. Paul was grateful for that. The first day back after a death or a funeral was awkward for all concerned. The constant expressions of sympathy, while well meaning, wore you down.

Earlier, Detective Inspector Traynor had called Paul into his office. After offering his condolences, he explained that the case officers, DS Rafferty and DC Brookes, might have a lead. Traynor’s long drawn features were lined, the eyes puffy with lack of sleep. Some years back he must have been a handsome man, yet now he seemed haggard. “A bit too soon to commit ourselves, Knight, but we’ll keep you informed of any progress.”

Detective Sergeant Muir had come in to commiserate, too.

“Thanks for attending the funeral,” Paul said.

Muir was portly, his paunch the result of too many bar lunches perhaps, his lips thick and wet, eyes small, bright blue and evasive. He said in a gravel voice, “Oh, yes, think nothing of it, Paul. Now give my regards to your mother, will you?”

“Do you know her, Sergeant?”

“Oh yes, indeed. Met a few times, at the Adult Education Centre. Nice lady.”

“I see. Yes, I will. And thanks.” Paul wondered what Muir had studied but was not inclined to raise the subject. Mum had done art, life-drawing, but couldn’t master the foreshortening perspective, she said, so she gave up, which was unusual – she never gave up on anything else, she wasn’t the sort. As it was while Dad was unemployed, maybe she didn’t want to pay out for any more term-fees.

Paul pulled his attention from the window and the seagulls, and watched Sue White, one of the civilian staff, as she inserted a blank Incident Log form – quadruple carbon-impregnated paper – into the computer.
 
Three of his reports down, one to go, he mused ruefully.
 
The day had been typical: four burglaries, taking down statements, completing the Property Taken form (in duplicate), feeling anger at the sight of the wanton destruction left in the wake of the culprits. Prized possessions trampled underfoot, carpets fouled, drawers and cupboards damaged; the list was endless. And insurance was little compensation. At each crime scene, he kept getting flashes of Gran, of her flat...
 
Of the four reported break-ins he attended, only one seemed to be professional. They took the DVD player, two televisions, and a hallmarked silver cutlery set, but left everything else untouched.

While inwardly he boiled to think these people believed they had the right to steal, he found himself agreeing with the aggrieved pensioners that “at least they didn’t do any damage”!

What have we come to, he wondered, when we feel grateful for being robbed by tidy burglars?

***
I am doing the right thing, Ben Morrison thought. From time to time, he took his eyes off the road to glance at the chisel on the passenger seat. It seemed to offer reassurance.

He drove his old blue Ford Fiesta into town and passed a string of boarded-up commercial premises. There was the empty block once owned by Woolworths, its windows now covered by wooden boards plastered over with tattered old election posters. The only places doing any kind of trade were the fast food outlets and charity shops. The town’s heart had been plucked out of it. He knew how the town felt.

Everywhere were yellow lines – and the car parks charged, which simply dissuaded shoppers from visiting the town. By chance, Ben found a parking spot at the curb opposite the building society. He switched off the engine and waited.

It was dark when he pulled out from the kerb and followed the black BMW driven by Mr. Dilwyn bloody Upperton, the building society manager. A company car, of course, Ben thought. His own car repayments were already a month outstanding. It was only a matter of time before he’d lose that as well.

The car radio played Classic FM, but he didn’t hear; Mendelssohn’s music had no calming effect on him this evening.

He steered the vehicle almost in a dream, keeping the BMW just within sight as they negotiated the evening traffic and headed out of town.

After about thirty minutes, they turned into the new Barrett development on the outskirts, ‘Cormorant Nest’. Five bedroom homes, two en suite bedrooms, double garages, study, games room. Only Two Remaining, proclaimed the billboard.

He drove slowly past as Upperton turned into the wide brick-laid drive of a Georgian-style detached house.

Pulling in a little further down the narrow road, Ben glanced guiltily at the chisel. His heart pounded and his fingers trembled. He felt out of place here, amidst so much executive wealth. It was intimidating. Then he checked the gently curving road. Nobody about. A few porch lights shone with a buttery glow, but the street lamps offered poor illumination.

He carefully put the tool in the pocket of his green anorak and got out of the car. His outer garment rustled at every movement. Eyeing the street, he unzipped it, removed the chisel, put it in his back pocket and flung the anorak on the passenger seat. He didn’t feel the cold; too intent on what he felt compelled to do. No point in locking the door, he thought.

He made his way along the path towards the Upperton house, hurried across the open lawn and quickly slunk into the shadows afforded by a row of evergreen bushes leading up to the back entrance. His heart pounded as he climbed the wrought iron gate, and fleetingly remembered the last time he’d scaled a garden gate, when courting Mary! Then, they’d been young, with the prospects of a good happy future. A gust of cold air caught the area over his kidneys as the pullover rode up at the back. He shivered as he landed on the other side.
 
Within a few seconds, he was out of breath after running over soft soil to the shadows of a small wooden garden shed.

By the time he reached the back of the house, his shoes were quite heavy, caked in mud.

The lights were on in the kitchen, the downstairs lounge and also one upstairs room. Upperton’s probably changing out of his day clothes, he thought.
 
He peered through a gap in the curtain of the French window.
 
Upperton’s blonde wife was in a long lounge, playing with two boys whose ages couldn’t be more than six or seven. A loving domestic scene, which he cast from his thoughts and turned away.

His legs felt like jelly. It wasn’t too late to back off, to get away. Ben reached for the chisel’s firm smooth wooden handle. He moved towards the kitchen’s back door, momentarily warmed by the exhaust fumes from the central heating flue. The kitchen door was closed but unlocked, so he wouldn’t need the chisel after all.
 
He opened the door, stepped inside and, guiltily recalling the recent image of Upperton’s wife, he slipped off his muddy shoes.
 
Heart hammering, he crossed the cushion-floor of the fitted teak kitchen and tensely waited at the ajar door. Squinting through the opening, he confirmed the hallway was clear.
 
Soundless in his stocking-feet, Ben dashed through the hall and up the stairs, sweat pouring in fear as he expected someone to come out and accost him at any minute.
 
He was halfway up when he realised he should have stopped a second to yank out the hall telephone jack. Too late now, though. He continued on up the stairs.
 
Light only showed in the gap underneath one door, at the back of the house. His mouth was very dry as he walked across the landing and opened the bedroom door. The decor was predominantly peach-coloured.
 
Upperton was singing under a shower in the bathroom adjoining the bedroom.

Ben remembered Upperton’s cold, heartless letter of intent he’d received in the mail. Was it only this morning? Heart suddenly hardened, he stepped through the doorway and crossed the thick-pile carpet to the bathroom.
 
On the bed was Upperton’s business suit, discarded like an unwanted shell. Ben wanted to rend the material, cut open the bed’s mattress, but that would be mindless and Mary would never forgive him. No, he would deal solely with Upperton, show the bastard for good and all!

Gripping the chisel in his right hand, Ben pushed the bathroom door wide.
 
Ben Morrison wailed in despair and rushed straight at Upperton as the manager stepped out of the shower cubicle.
 
Overweight, his pink flesh wet and glistening, Upperton was transfixed. His eyes dropped to the weapon in Ben’s hand. He squeaked, “Who the blazes!”
 
Ben hurled the chisel away from him and it clattered noisily into the bath. Upperton flinched as Ben took a step closer, trembling with anger. “You people in your fancy posh houses!” he sobbed. “You have no idea the pain and worry you cause!” He took another step and shoved shaking hands at Upperton’s flabby chest. He pushed, the contact of his palms against cold clammy flesh unnerving.

Upperton exclaimed and overbalanced against a set of weighing-scales. His outstretched hand grabbed the shower curtain, tearing it and the rail down. Upperton fell heavily on the carpet floor, his belly and flaccid sex wobbling.
 
His heart hammering, Ben wiped his hands on his shirt, his throat dry. He turned on his heel and dashed onto the landing and down the stairs.
 
In a final act of frustration, he lashed out with his hand at a Chinese-style vase at the foot of the stairs in the hall. As it smashed on the floor, he wrenched open the front door.

“Dilwyn, what on earth is–?” Mrs. Upperton came out of the lounge and gasped. “Oh, my God!”

Leaving the door swinging open, Ben raced over the grass, the soft moist surface uncomfortable on the soles of his stocking feet. My shoes! But he kept on running.
 
He jerked open his car door and pushed the key in the ignition. He drove away, steering erratically, hands tight-clenched, eyes streaming.
 
He couldn’t do it.
 
Failed even in his attempt at retribution.
 
A complete failure!

***
NOTES:
Chapter headings carry news items based on real events.
Alverbank is a fictional town on the south coast of Hampshire, England.
The funeral was Paul's gran, her death as a result of a robbery.
The reference to Paul’s mother has dramatic repercussions later in the story.
Ben’s ordeal is not over yet, either…

Sudden Vengeance – paperback and e-book

 
 Amazon COM here

 Amazon UK here

 
 

 

 

 

Wednesday, 4 February 2015

Write about what you know - 'despicable you'

Ever been burgled or robbed?  It isn’t pleasant. It’s a gut-wrenching, traumatic experience. A sense of being defiled. Some victims can’t ‘move on’ without actually moving house.
Wikipedia commons

Reformed jewel thief Bill Mason admits, late in the day, that he never appreciated the ‘depressing and disturbing feeling of violation on the part of the victims’. See my review of his book Nine Lives here

Some years ago we were burgled, and some family heirloom jewellery stolen, among other precious things. Another time, our suitcases were stolen from the fourteenth floor of a hotel in Calgary - at the beginning of our holiday. And about six years ago our daughter and son-in-law were burgled by men who kicked in the door, knowing she was out at work. Fortunately, her neighbour spotted them and made a note of their getaway vehicle’s registration number. Today (the wheels of justice grind slowly!) I accompanied our daughter to the Spanish court where one of the culprits was arraigned before the judge. He wouldn’t maintain eye-contact. It was a distressing time, especially as it brought back terrible memories, for example he or his pals hurt the family dogs while breaking in.

There are words to describe these arrogant people who would rather steal than work for a living: despicable, scum and lowlife are three printable options. I know there are others.

Here’s an excerpt from Sudden Vengeance, a novel I wrote to vent some of the anger at these individuals:

Paul pulled his attention from the window and the seagulls, and watched Sue White, one of the civilian staff, as she inserted a blank Incident Log form – quadruple carbon-impregnated paper – into the electronic typewriter.

Three of his reports down, one to go, he mused ruefully.

The day had been typical: four burglaries, taking down statements, completing the Property Taken form (in duplicate), feeling anger at the sight of the wanton destruction left in the wake of the culprits. Prized possessions trampled underfoot, carpets fouled, drawers and cupboards damaged; the list was endless. And insurance was little compensation. At each crime scene, he kept getting flashes of Gran, of her flat...

Of the four reported break-ins he attended, only one seemed to be professional. They took the DVD player, two televisions, and a hallmarked silver cutlery set, but left everything else untouched.

While inwardly he boiled to think these people believed they had the right to steal, he found himself agreeing with the aggrieved pensioners that “at least they didn’t do any damage”!

What have we come to, he wondered, when we feel grateful for being robbed by tidy burglars?

- Sudden Vengeance by Nik Morton, published by Crooked Cat

Amazon UK here

Amazon COM here

The ‘despicable you’, the lowlife in court today pleaded guilty and was given a prison sentence of one year, suspended.

Saturday, 14 June 2014

Saturday Story - 'The Irascible Demon'

 
grimoire - Wikipedia commons
 
 
THE IRASCIBLE DEMON
 
Nik Morton
 
 
At the third attempt he finally mastered the skylight. Wood splintered from the rusted latch and he raised the creaking frame. Moonlight dimly revealed the attic floor nine feet below. The room appeared to be empty: Raditz hadn't returned unexpectedly, then.
            Axel Houston crouched, indecisive; then he was committed, lowering himself over the sill. His angular frame dangled a moment then he dropped the remaining three feet to the carpeted floor. A renegade board creaked under his weight. Earlier, on deciding to break in, he’d felt slightly absurd dressing entirely in black, like a fugitive from some spy movie; but now, merging into the shadows, he was thankful: the precaution seemed to give him some measure of reassurance. Breaking and entering was not new to him, but he was still affected: there was considerable pleasure in a quickened pulse and heart-beat, all senses acutely alert.
            Grey eyes now accustomed to the dark, he perceived the two walls completely obscured by stacks of dust-draped books and dockets of senescent papers. A long wide table stood against the third wall, crammed with large old leather-bound tomes. A human skull - or a good replica - served as a bizarre paperweight.
            Stubs of green-wax candles had overflowed two black candlesticks. Rashly, Axel lit one, almost burning his stubby fingers as the wick abruptly flared into hissing yellow-green light. The candles released a sickly sulphurous odour.
            Above the table was a small recessed window, its lowered blind decorated with arcane symbols. Alongside the door set in the other wall was a grandfather clock, pendulum soundlessly swaying, mesmerising.
            In the centre of the room were two chintz-covered armchairs. He stared, suddenly aware that from the skylight he’d been unable to see whether anyone had been ensconced in either. The wings of the chair-backs seemed almost predatory, malevolent. He faltered, stepped forward slowly; his whole body trembled in expectation, anticipating the worst though incapable of giving his fears form.
            A movement of furniture springs sent his heart hammering.
            He involuntarily jumped as a black cat hissed and leapt to the floor, its pads lightly thudding. Bright yellow eyes glared, accusing. Axel attempted to calm his pounding heart while the cat disappeared in the shadows. Both chairs were now empty.
            He began to breathe more normally again and looked around. It seemed that Raditz was more than merely interested in the occult. Axel hefted a weighty tome: Ashtakhan's Grimoire. He perused the piles of books, located a row of dictionaries. ‘Grimoire: a work on black magic detailing how to utilise the services of devils...’ What utter rubbish!
            Nevertheless, an uncanny tingling sensation tiptoed his spine. Suggestion, he told himself; fear of the unknown or the unexplained. Strong weapons in any sorcerer's armoury. Fear of the unknown makes people susceptible; they create horrors out of their own minds.
            This Grimoire, for instance. It had opened at an obviously well thumbed section about halfway through. Beautiful illuminated script, delicately executed. If it was a spell, as he assumed, it wasn't in any language he could name; indeed, it bore no resemblance to Romance or its forebear, Latin. He tried rolling the words round his tongue. They had a distinctive, rather poetic ring, incomprehensible though they were.
            He coughed on the candle-smoke, leafed through again, came across a similar arrangement of characters. He tried these. Yes, attractive; he could see why some people might learn to hold such utterances in awe. Rare poetry held similar sway. But as for simple word-permutations creating some form of life or effect - !
            ‘You're not impressed, then?’
            Axel's heart almost decided to give up; right now he was sure it had plummeted into his shoes. He pivoted round, nerves jangling, adrenaline flooding his system. Nobody was in the room: the door hadn't opened, he was sure. He consulted grandfather - still only 11pm. Barring a change in pattern, Raditz wouldn't be back till past midnight.
            Then - where'd - ?
            ‘Down here, you numbskull!’
            The voice came from –
He looked down between his palms that rested on the Grimoire, and couldn't move an eyelid, let alone a muscle.
            Against all sense or reason, a small naked man stood between his hands on the Grimoire's slightly smoke-laden pages. Measuring no more than eight inches tall, he was hairless and covered in green and rust scales. Aubergine-coloured wings were folded neatly behind his shoulder blades. A disproportionately large penis dangled, provocatively twitching as he spoke. His head seemed to sprout two small stumps - embryo horns?
            ‘Correct - very percipient... But enough time wasting twaddle! Why have you summoned me, tell me that?’
            Unfortunately, Axel was not able to tell him anything. He was thinking that his plan to steal esoteric curios had gone wrong. What kind of power did the old doctor possess? Indeed, what would he do when he learned that his attic had been broken into, his secrets laid bare?
            ‘Your mind seems in a sorry state. Look, I'm growing impatient, poltroon.’ The little demon screwed up his face to look even more unprepossessing, and tapped his foot in added emphasis. ‘It's against my nature to wait, so come on now.’
            Lips quivered but Axel couldn't muster any sound. He paled.
            The demon sighed. ‘I've got too much to do in the infernal regions to bother about folk who don't know what they want, dullard! Plenty of souls to damn thrice-fold!’
            CRACK! went his leathery wings and in an instant he was hovering in front of Axel's unmoving if sweating face. ‘I must have a death in order to dematerialise,’ he explained reasonably enough, ‘so you'll have to do.’ And he proceeded to strangle Axel with an invisible cord and there was nothing Axel could do about it but lose consciousness.
 
‘Feeling better, are you?’ enquired a grave voice.
            Head throbbing like too many hangovers hung-over, Axel tentatively nodded and wished he hadn’t. He elbowed himself off the table.
Grandfather chimed six. In the morning? The blind was raised and sunlight beamed onto Raditz seated in his armchair, a benign, almost paternal smile creasing his lined weathered features. Flecks of grey bordered the jet-black long hair. Then Axel remembered and shuddered: ‘I - I had this terrible dream...’
            ‘What have you got to say about breaking into my rooms, which is more to the point, don't you think?’
            Axel quietened, trying to sort out fact from dream. He studied his surroundings. There wasn't a trace of occult paraphernalia at all. And he was still in the attic, the broken skylight blatant evidence above... ‘I was curious about your rumoured hobby,’ he said. ‘Occult goods're fetching a good price these days. Wizards are popular – all to do with that Harry Potter, I reckon.’ Gingerly, he planted his feet on the floor, edged towards the door.
            Raditz stood up abruptly. ‘So you know I’m a wizard?’
            ‘Well,’ he gestured at the room, ‘it looks like it.’
            ‘Oh, dear.’
            ‘I was curious, that’s all…’
Raditz placed his slightly bent frame in Axel's way. ‘You know what curiosity did?’ He smiled; but there was no good humour in it.
            ‘Killed the cat. But I’m not a cat – or even a cat burglar.’ He laughed at his witticism but Raditz simply studied him. ‘Look, I’m a good burglar, I never trash my targets’ places. Never. Too much respect.’ He paused, fingered his chin. ‘They get insurance money and probably blow it on a holiday or cruise. I’m doing them a favour.’
‘For a thief, you're honest enough, I suppose. Let me go with you as far as the end of the street.’
            ‘You're not calling the police?’
            Raditz shook his head; that damnable smile again! ‘You can catch a bus?’
            ‘How did you know I had no c- ?’ Axel swallowed, nodded, and lowered his gaze from those penetrating eyes. Suddenly, he didn't want to know anything more about Dr Raditz.
            As they emerged onto the deserted street, Raditz broke the silence. ‘You realise, that wasn't a dream...’
            Feet disconcertingly like lead, Axel stared. ‘The incantation - it worked?’
            ‘Oh, indubitably. You were lying quite dead when...’
            ‘Dead?’
            ‘Please, don't interrupt - there isn't much time... your bus will be here soon...’ They walked on. ‘When I found you dead, obviously strangled, I smelled traces of henbane and aconite and knew by the spell displayed in the open Grimoire that you'd summoned Ignatius the irascible demon... I didn't want a corpse on the premises.’ Raditz smiled, almost apologetically. ‘For obvious reasons... So I called the little devil back again.’
            They stopped by the bus stop.
Axel touched his throat. It was a little tender... But - dead? He felt all right.
            ‘Naturally, he was most upset about being summoned. Doesn't like a recall. My demands really got his ire up. Ignatius didn't want to bring you back to life; against his religion, he said. Told me to see the other feller.’ Raditz thumbed at the dull, bruised sky. ‘I was pretty desperate. I’d settle for anything to get you out of my place - sorry, but I've my reputation to think of. Eventually, we came to an agreement. Under the circumstances, I'm happy enough.’
            ‘You mean - that little demon - he actually brought me back to life? Just like that?’
            ‘Ah, here's the bus! Yes, that's it - just like that.’
            The bus pulled up; it seemed brimful with workmen, standing room only. Axel stood on the pay-as-you-enter steps, fishing out change. ‘I can hardly credit it, doctor - but, well, thanks for - for putting things right.’ He pocketed his ticket as the vehicle moved off.
            Raditz called after him, ‘Trouble was, Ignatius only settled for a short while...’
            A few hundred yards down the road Raditz's words finally penetrated.
            Axel's fingers tightened on the hand-grip; he broke out into a cold sweat, craned his neck and saw the doctor at the roadside shrugging his shoulders: ‘Sorry,’ he seemed to be implying. Axel's hand went to his chest, it felt constricted, breathing difficult. Yellow dots spun before his eyes. Sudden massive and excruciating pain creased his features as the iron band tightened over his chest. ‘My heart!’ he cried and died.
 
***
Previously published in Peeping Tom, 1990
Copyright, 2014
 
If you enjoyed this story, you might like Spanish Eye,
my short story collection featuring Leon Cazador, private eye in 22 cases
published by Crooked Cat Publishing.

Monday, 9 June 2014

Writing anatomy lesson: Know the secret of our hearts

My latest crime thriller from Crooked Cat is Sudden Vengeance. For a couple of blog posts I thought I’d provide a little autopsy of a few scenes. So, here goes:

Once the Prologue has established a rather unpleasant nameless villain, Sudden Vengeance moves to a cemetery, where the Knight family is burying Gran, who died while being burgled. The Knight family comprises Paul, a policeman, Mark, Stuart, Lisa, Mum (Cathy) and Dad (David). The narrative is sometimes omniscient, the better to view the whole picture, then at particularly emotional moments it drops into the point of view of the main character in any scene. We’ve seen Paul described here and there follows David and Cathy.

Treating the descriptions and character studies in a similar fashion to a film director, the camera lingers on their appearance and then delves into their thoughts – and hearts. Each character sequence then segues into another in the family, so the ending of Cathy, the Mum’s sequence runs: ‘Standing next to Paul was Mark, the young rebel who, surprisingly to most people but not to her, was taking Gran’s death hardest of all the family.’

***

Mark was almost Paul’s height, with the same though considerably longer dark hair, partly covering his left earring. He also had his older brother’s sharp penetrating brown eyes. There the similarities ended, for where Paul was heavily built and big-boned, Mark was lithe, narrow-shouldered and possessed a lighter frame; an inheritance from his mother. His crooked nose was the result of a childhood accident – Paul had fished him out of the harbour after he fell off the Alverbank ferry pontoon.

Mark’s face was grim, a cast of features unusual for him, as he tended to be happy and carefree, with the beginnings of laughter grooves at the corners of his mouth and eyes.

He was bitterly angry. For all his seventeen years, his life had been wound up with the family and especially with Gran. She’d nursed him when Mum went off to work. She’d shared his interest in books and nurtured a deep-rooted love of reading.

He felt cast adrift, without a sea anchor – a term he’d picked up from Hornblower. Gran had wanted him to become a writer, but it seemed to him to be a bit precarious as a profession – even if your name wasn’t Salman Rushdie – as was acting, the career he really wanted to follow. Maybe Gran’s prejudices against the stage were due to her interpretation of J.B. Priestley’s The Good Companions? He didn’t think it strange to be mulling over these subjects. Gran had always said, “Enjoy reading, my boy, and you have the world at your fingertips!” How right she was. Though now his fingertips itched to get round the neck of the bastard who had murdered her!

He glanced away guiltily as the vicar’s words impinged, “...deliver us from the bitter pains of eternal death. You know the secrets of our hearts: in your mercy hear our prayer, forgive us our sins, and at our last hour let us not fall away from you.” 

Oh, Gran, Mark thought, I’m sorry, but I can’t forgive him, whoever he is.

For all his rebellious attempts to break away from parental expectations – such as long hair, an earring, and studying arts instead of “proper useful technical subjects” – Mark was conservative deep down, and Gran had sensed this all along. “You may fool all your pals, and even your sister and brothers, Mark,” she said, “but you don’t fool me!”

Mark’s fingers tensed into knuckles at his side.

God, he was so angry – with everyone, especially those he loved, including Gran for getting herself robbed and killed in the first place!

He let his tears run freely, and blinked to see Lisa standing next to Paul. Why can’t you get the bastard, you’re the oldest, the cleverest, and the best? What are you doing about it, Paul?

Mark stared down into the dark grave, feeling amidst his family alone with his anger and his grief.
Legs suddenly feeling weak, Lisa linked her left arm through Paul’s as Reverend Dorner said, “We have entrusted our sister, Dorothy, to God’s merciful keeping, and we now commit her body to the ground: earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust: in sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died, was buried, and rose again for us...”
 
Through a mist of tears, she watched the coffin being lowered into the ground. She tried telling herself, without conviction, that Gran wasn’t in the ground, her soul had left her shell; now she was with Grandad.

Soil scrabbled down and made an awful resonant thudding sound on the coffin. There was also the damp smell of freshly-turned earth. Dimly she could hear sobbing and hiccoughs of grief.
 
It didn’t seem right. Barely a month ago, she’d celebrated her nineteenth birthday, with Gran in attendance – “let out for the day and for good behaviour,” Gran had remarked, winking.

Gran had been proud of Lisa’s offer of a place at Sussex University. “You take full advantage of this women’s liberation, my girl!” Lisa had refrained from saying that phrase was passé; now it was feminism. “I had to make do – very well, mind you – with reading about the world beyond Hampshire, but if you get good marks at your studies, the world can be yours!” Lisa hadn’t the heart to mention the many unemployed graduates, or the large debts most students built up while on campus. Think positive, that’s what Gran always advocated.

For the few days around the funeral, Lisa had left her friend, Viv, to take notes at their lectures.

For most of her young life Lisa had resented being endowed with similar genes to Paul. She wanted to be feminine and petite, but being big-boned and tall – five-ten – with a full figure – (Warren said he liked proper curves in a woman), Lisa resigned herself to becoming the best Human Sciences student the university had ever had. She was also a good sportswoman, being successful at swimming, discus, fencing and javelin. Right now, she would dearly love to hurl a javelin at the junkie freak who’d murdered Gran!
 
Again, Gran had said, “Think positively, my girl! Think what you can do, not what you can’t!” Lisa smiled without humour and wondered what Gran would have said about her sleeping with Warren, a fellow student. Probably applaud it, but hand out useful advice as well. She’d taken Aunt Sarah’s sexual preference in her stride, after all, which had surprised even Mum and Dad.

Lisa’s long auburn hair blew in the wind, even though swept back under a black bandeau. The freckles she detested over her nose were finally starting to fade. Her big blue eyes, which usually sparkled, were now awash with tears. She thought her full mouth was a little on the large size, but Warren disagreed completely and enjoyed what she could do to him with it.

She shook herself guiltily, dismissing erotic thoughts of Warren just as Stu on her right linked her free arm.
 
… which leads on to Stuart – and the end of the first chapter.

Each family member is important to the story-line in a number of ways. This method of revelation helps establish them at the outset, and hopefully provides enough insight and emotion to draw the reader into empathising with some if not all.

There are many ways to start a book. This felt the right way for me. Creating atmosphere, suppressed anger, and grief and showing a family unit being strong together in adversity. 

***
 
 

Sudden Vengeance published by Crooked Cat - here

Amazon UK here 

Amazon COM here 

Smashwords here